Ahh, Summer. Finally there isn’t a single trace of seasonal depression, and instead it’s just regular depression (which I’d take over SAD any day). The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and my anxiety is still very prevalent. Just because it’s summer and I feel better, doesn’t mean I can start slacking with my self care routine.
I, very often, find myself overwhelmed suddenly and
wondering what happened. Usually that’s because I haven’t been taking care of
myself and instead, just trying to get as much things done as possible.
I figured why not make a summer themed self care list of things I want to do before the summer is over. As you may know from reading my last post, I am moving into a house at the end of this month. This is going to give me so many more opportunities to actually enjoy the weather. Where I live currently, I don’t go outside much because the only “yard” I have is a gravel driveway. So I think it’s fitting that the first thing on my summer bucket list is:
- Lay outside
I am so excited to just lay out on a towel on the deck and get some sun. Nothing feels better than listening to music and taking a nap outside, even if you wake up with a gnarly burn. It’s worth it
- Get back into streaming, seriously.
I used to stream on Twitch, which is a mainly video game based streaming website. I really enjoyed doing this, but stopped because I realized it was consuming my life. I always had a drink (or 10) on twitch because it made me feel less nervous about playing video games for strangers, and it quickly turned into me only streaming with a drink in my hand.
I’m going to get back into streaming, and very rarely, if ever have a drink while I do it. Part of me wants to make this a jobby, and while it’s not my main career goal, I’d like to take it seriously as if it is something that can be profitable, because it is. When I was streaming before, I actually got donated over $100 over the short timespan I was doing it.
- Have a bonfire with friends
One of the things I am the most excited for when it comes to moving, is having bonfires. I have a cute little bonfire area in my back yard, and I’m going to be decking it out with string lights and cute decorations. I am so excited to make a charcuterie board and have my close friends over for a couple drinks around the fire.
- Read a book
When this year started, I wanted to read 6 books. Well, the year is half over and I’ve read 3 so I really need to get my ass into gear. I’m going to throw on my sunglasses and read a book on my deck. Bonus points: If it’s raining I can go downstairs to my second living space to read and get away from Danny.
- Get houseplants and actually keep them alive
The problem with growing houseplants in a basement apartment is, there’s no light. Like none. Zip. Zilch. Notta. I managed to somehow kill a succulent, and they are like the most low maintenance plant around. I’m so excited to have a little plant family that will thrive in the house.
- Plant a Garden
I have wanted to plant a vegetable garden for as long as I can remember, but I’ve never been able to. I’m moving in at the end of June and you bet at the Beginning of July I’ll be growing whatever is in season.
- Have a BBQ
My sister in law is pretty much leaving everything to go to our neighbouring city to do her residency, and that includes her BBQ. Danny and I are so pumped to have a bbq and to sit outside on our deck to eat. It’s crazy how excited we are to do things most people already can.
- Go to a beach
Something I struggle with, but am trying very hard to let go of, is my body image. My self esteem is not great, and it never has been. This year I’m trying to stick to the mindset of “If you look at me and feel disgust, that’s a you problem”. And Part of that is wearing a bathing suit and going to the beach. I’ve lost about 20 pounds since I was my heaviest, but I’m still not happy with the way I look. However, I have given up dieting because of the way it makes my brain feel, and part of accepting my body for what it is, is not hiding it in public.
- Eat more seasonal produce
While I am giving up the diet mentality, I like to eat mostly healthy. Because it’s summer and the local produce is abundant, I want to have local produce in every meal I make. Ultimately, I’d like to grow my own produce but until then, the local farmers market will do.
- Say “Yes” more.
An example of this is my best friend inviting me to her end of school year party this Friday coming up. There are going to be tons of strangers there, but it’s going to be beautiful out and It’s a good chance to get some sun and some socialization. Typically I would just jump right to saying no, because I have social anxiety and people I don’t know is a huge trigger. But not this time. I said yes, not only to go to the party, but to go early to set up.
This summer, I’m going to say “yes” more. I need to get out there, socialize, and be happy. Because saying “no” all the time may feel better than the fear of saying yes, but actually going through with the plans feels better than saying no. You feel me?
What’s on your Summer to do list? Let me know in the comments,
and as always
Take care of yourself